HealthInfo Waitaha Canterbury

Helping your baby get settled

There are some things you can do to help settle and comfort your baby.

Look after yourself

• Talk to others. Remember you're not alone and other parents will have had the same problems. It can help to share how you're feeling.
• Have some time out, as a crying baby is hard work!

• Ask friends, family, or your partner, to give you a break so that you can have some time away from your baby.
• Look after yourself and to rest when you can. Ask for help with some of your other jobs, like the housework, meals, shopping, picking other children up from school or preschool.

If you feel you're not coping, are tearful, worried, angry, feeling down and hopeless, it's important to seek help for yourself. Mothers with unsettled babies can have postnatal depression or anxiety. Contact your GP, Well Child provider, or midwife.

Be smokefree

Keep your baby away from smoke, both inside and outside the house, and in the car. Read more about how to become smokefree.

Use tips to soothe and settle

Soothing your baby can be hard when they are unsettled and crying.

• Some babies respond to being held or by gentle movement. But sometimes this can have the opposite effect and can actually overstimulate the baby.
• Allow your baby to soothe themselves, by putting them down for five to 10 minutes. Babies can need a break from all the touching, talking, and rocking. It does not harm your baby to allow them time to settle themselves and it gives you a break.
• No one strategy works and it can be trial and error to work out what settles your baby at any one time and this is likely to change from day to day.

Use good feeding skills

• Make time for your baby's feeding, by slowing down and following their cues or signs. Your baby may show you they're ready to feed by nuzzling, hand-sucking, or mouthing (where they open their mouth and turn their head). Crying is usually the baby's last cue for feeding and means they are getting distressed. Try to feed your baby before they start crying, otherwise you may have trouble getting them to settle and feed.
• Try to keep your baby upright for about 30 minutes after a feed. If your baby spills in bed, they will not choke. It's important to put your baby to sleep on their back to prevent sudden unexpected death in infancy (SUDI).
• If you're breastfeeding, changing what you eat is unlikely to help but you could talk to your GP, Well Child provider, or midwife. Changing to formula feeding is not likely to change your baby's crying patterns.
• If your baby is formula fed, do not keep changing formula to see if this helps. If you would like to change formula, talk to your GP, Well Child provider, or midwife.

Help with sleep

Help your baby to become a good sleeper.

• Put your baby in bed when they are drowsy but awake, so that they learn to go to sleep by themselves.
• Have a bedtime routine, for example, having a bath, reading a book, singing a song, then a quiet feed with the lights dim before putting your baby to bed. This helps the baby learn the difference between night and day.
• When feeding during the night, keep calm and quiet and avoid too much interaction, such as talking or singing.
• Keeping your baby awake all day will not help them sleep better at night. Daytime sleep is important too. The amount of daytime sleep your baby needs will vary and become less as they get older. A daytime routine of feeding, playing, then sleeping can be helpful.

Medicines

Medicines (such as omeprazole and ranitidine) have not been shown to help unsettled and crying babies, and may cause harm.

Get help from others

Talk to your general practice team, Well Child provider, or midwife for advice.

Plunket can provide support and assistance. You can call PlunketLine 0800‑933‑922 free 24 hours a day, for child health and parenting questions.

Parenting support is available through several groups.

Written by HealthInfo clinical advisers. Last reviewed October 2021.

Page reference: 44458

Review key: HIUCB-33560